I SHOULD be packing

As the doom of moving lurks around me, I can’t seem to get enough motivation to do anything.  This fog is thick and is impossible to maneuver through.  We aren’t moving far, so I am not planning on packing much.  Clothes will stay on the hangars and just go from one closet to the next; dishes will be stacked on my lap and go from one cabinet to the next.  But even though this should be easier, somehow there is still SO MUCH to do!  And the garage?  It currently looks like a hoarder’s nest. I cannot even think about it.

Should I do laundry?  It would be just to put it all away in places that won’t exist in3 days…it just doesn’t seem to be worth it.  Yet, there’s a load in the washer and one in the dryer.  Dusting, mopping, and cleaning is still happening since my landlord is showing the house almost daily, but it seems like a moot point.  It is just getting dirtier when I pack, and when we move it will end up downright filthy.  Why bother?  With huge projects like going through closets and cabinets, there doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day to watch kids, carpool to and from school, and keep up with the things that maintain the house.  Needless to say, I am starting to feel overwhelmed.  

While on the subject of being overwhelmed, I am more of a cat than a dog.  I saw this meme and knew it was me to a T.  I don’t do well on car trips, I don’t like change, and I do not like to move.  Seriously.  I FREAK OUT on car trips.  And I really cannot handle moving.  My body doesn’t do well with change either.  I end up really sick EVERY time.  Every.  Time.  The day we decided we are moving, I cried. Within a day I started getting lip sores.  Disgusting, yes.  I have had lip sores off and on for the past 2 weeks straight.  Sunday I started getting a sore throat, too.  I have had a headache and a sore throat with extreme fatigue since Sunday.  Like I said, I am a cat.  I cannot handle change, not mentally, not physically, not emotionally.

I only have nine boxes packed.  Nine.  You really can’t even tell that we are moving.  I am not lazy and I am not even procrastinating (well, maybe a little).  The idea of moving just seems too big.  Raul is working two jobs and so he isn’t here during the day or at night.  I am doing all of this alone.  Because being a mom of four was easy enough.  Because babysitting other kids in addition to my own was just plain simple.  Because being totally and completely OCD and constantly clean and tidy was just a breeze.  Please, please pile more on my plate.

On a completely different and unrelated note, we went to the pediatrician yesterday.  He and I did a questionnaire-style test on Alex for Asperger’s.  He scored on almost every question.  It was almost funny to me because I have been keeping a list of things that are extremes for him, or things that worry me, ticks of his, and just some other Alex-isms.  Every single thing on my list were questions that were asked on the test.  I know my mom’s intuition is right, but sometimes you hope to be wrong.  I can say that, while I am relieved that there might be an explanation, I am disappointed that I might be right.  There is not an official diagnosis as of now, but we are definitely in the works of getting one.  I will make sure to keep everyone posted.  

Kylie finally grew. Finally. She even hit 40 pounds!!! Her stomach aches are concerning, though, so we are going to be doing lab work and starting her on meds.  Of course her OCD and anxiety are worrisome so we will be keeping an eye on those behaviors as well.  But for now she is mostly healthy and finally on the growth charts! 

Aiden is still around the 5th percentile on everything.   He's always been so tiny! I don't know how anyone could not love Aiden.  That little guy is a fighter and took his four year-old shots like a champ!  That kid steals everyone's hearts.  

Okay so clearly all these updates on my kids really does boil down to procrastination.  I will stop procrastinating.  Thanks for reading, y'all!